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Scenes We'd Like To See
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Category · Infobox

Series 1
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 2
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 3
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6
Full list of scenarios

Series 4
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
Full list of scenarios

Series 5
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 6
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 7
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 8
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5
2010 Sport Relief Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 9
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 10
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 11
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11 · 12
Full list of scenarios

Series 12
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 13
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Compilation Episode
Christmas Special
New Year's Eve Special
Full list of scenarios

Series 14
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Series 15
1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11
Full list of scenarios

Templates
Link to an edition of the round
Link to a specific scenario
TOC for scenario lists

The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the fifth episode of the twelfth series.

Key Edit

  • HD – Hugh Dennis
  • CA – Chris Addison
  • HC – Hal Cruttenden
  • AP – Andy Parsons
  • EB – Ed Byrne
  • JW – Josh Widdicombe

Topics Edit

Unlikely Things To Hear On Daytime TV Edit

CA - Well, these 4 date from the early parts of last century, some wear and tear, little bit of tarnishing there, but please welcome today's Loose Women!

AP - Welcome to Channel 4 Daytime, or as you said to your boss this morning, Working From Home.

HD - Coming up next, 2 programmes you don't want to get confused, escape to the huntryside and bargain... hang on.

CA - The next programme is Pointless. It's the Jeremy Kyle Show.

AP - Coming up, Teletubbies Uncut. Yes, you're going get to see Tinky Winky's winky, and Dipsy's Laa Laa.

HD - Next, Judge Judy. I have, she's shit.

EB - Hello and welcome to, Let's Decorate the Shit Out Of This House! This week we're decorating the shit out of a 3-bed semi in Orpington. SO LET'S DO IT! Let's Decorate the Shit Out Of This House!

JW - Next up, another property programme, which is pretty offensive when we consider you're all unemployed.

HC - Hello, welcome to This Morning. I'm Phillip, I'm a man on television, so I can go grey and look older. This is Holly, one wrinkle and she's finished.

AP - So David wants to retire by the sea, so we've advised him to buy Norwich, so by the time he's retired, the sea would have come to him.

HD - Next on Flog It, the team meet their greatest challenge yet: A dead horse.

CA - And now, a trip round Dara O'Briain's head, in Hair Hunters.

JW - Next up, the Austrian version of Cash In The Attic. It's Family In The Basement.

EB - Hello and welcome to, Let's Cook the Shit Out Of Some Dinner!

HD - And now, on BBC One, let's make an appointment with doctors. If we phone now, we may be able to see them next Thursday.

HC - Welcome to A Place In The Sun, the show that's for people who aren't sure if they want to live in Britain or move abroad. First up, Abu Qatada.

JW - Next up, on ITV 3, it's a cutting edge American drama. I'm only joking, it's Taggart again.

EB - Hello and welcome to, I'm Going To Sell These Antiques if it Fucking Kills Me!

Unlikely Things To Hear In Hospital Edit

JW - I'm afraid we've lost him, but in my defence, Dr. Dre's just a stage name.

HC - Right, I'm afraid you have had a stroke, so can you now take your hand off my trousers?

JW - The good news is I can save your leg, the bad news is I can't save the rest of you.

AP - His heart stopped, quick! Get the defibr... defibrill... de...! Ah sorry, he's dead.

EB - Look, who's the doctor here, me or you? Seriously, I've been waiting for so long I can't even tell anymore.

HD - Ok, I think we should remove the mole. How did it get up there?

AP - Welcome to Ashford Hospital, why not join me in playing: Pregnant or Fat?

JW - Now students, we know the operation has been a failure, because we heard a buzzing and his nose lit up.

HC - Welcome to the Cardiology Unit. BOO!

HD - No you've got to leave this afternoon Mrs. Smith, we need your bed. I'm shagging a nurse in it at 4 o' clock.

CA - Your husband is in a stable condition. His room's filthy and there's horse shit everywhere.

EB - You could look it at that way, or you can think of it as gaining a hook.

CA - Who him, that's my former husband. Well, because you asked me to bring in my ex-Ray.

HD - I'm afraid we're a bit short of time today, do you mind if we pull the sheet over you now?

CA - I'm sorry, we're all full up at A&E, we're going to have to send you to B&Q.

AP - You'll just feel a small prick, and then I'll pull my trousers up and won't bother you again.

CA - Now what seems to be the probl... FUCKING HELL!

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