The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the eleventh episode of the fifth series.
Unlikely Things For a Royal Correspondent To SayEdit
- FB: Isn't it wonderful to see Prince Charles being made king...at the age of 137!
- AP: And the Queen there majestically taking her place in the queue, to withdraw her savings from Northern Rock.
- HD: The Queen asked me if I was from the BBC and I said I was....and she told me to piss off!
- AP: There we see Prince Phillip going over to talk to man from China...this should be interesting.
- MM: In fact it's the Chinese premier, and he's just asked him for a menu.
- FB: Prince Harry hasn't been put off by the congestion charge, he says he still manages to come into Chelsea twice a day!
- HD: Well the crowd are absolutely loving this event, the night sky is dancing with light, yes, the Queen set fire to Windsor Castle again...
- FB: It's great to see the whole family waving from the balcony....through the sights of my AK-47!
- HD: And as Prince Phillip cuts the tape to open this mental institution...the doctors have got him!
- HD: Oh and he's skipped through the defence and that's lucky because if these South Sea Islanders catch you...they eat you.
- FB: Time for the scrum where the players can have a quick kiss, and exchange phone numbers.
- AP: And it's the coin toss, and Johnny Wilkinson has sprained his thumb!
- HD: And that is a massive tackle....wish mine was like that.
- FB: Not everyone's been able to get tickets to this World Cup final, and we know a lot of you are watching at home, so hello to you: The England team!
- HD: Oh and it's bad news for New Zealand...Rugby Doesn't Matter!
- BN: And keep an eye on this ball as it hits the ground cos it's such an unusual shape it could go anywhere!
- AP: (Imitating rugby chant dance) CILLIT BANG! CILLIT BANG! KIA ORA! KIA ORA!
- FB: All pretence has been abandoned as both teams take to the field naked covered in lubricant to the sound of pounding techno.
- RH: Thick muscular necks, broken noses and powerful thighs. The rugby wives are minging.
- FB: This young man has a brilliant playing career ahead of him, followed by a bleak career as an after dinner speaker before his suicide at 40.
- HD: Well he is in many ways the perfect fly-half: legs of a human, torso of a blue bottle.
- RH: The South Africans their passing to their one black player Johnny Token.
- HD: So it's England versus Samoa, a team of rank amateurs against Samoa
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