Series 5, Episode 2

Episode 28
Title	Series 5, Episode 2
Air date	19 July 2007
Host	Dara Ó Briain
Left team	Mark Watson Hugh Dennis Frankie Boyle
Right team	Andy Parsons Jo Caulfield Russell Howard
Result	Hugh and Frankie's team won
Episode guide
Previous	Series 5, Episode 1
Next	Series 5, Episode 3

The second episode of the fifth series was first broadcast on the 19 July 2007.

Guests

Team	Guest	#
Hugh and Frankie's team	Mark Watson	5th appearance
Andy and Russell's team	Jo Caulfield	2nd appearance

Rounds

Headliners

• C.S.I.P. – Conservatives Slide In Polls
  • FB: Cunt Seen In Photo
  • FB: CSI: Portsmouth (Crime Scene Investigation: Portsmouth)
  • HD: Cameron's Strangely Invisible Policies
  • AP: Conceited Shallow Inbred Prat
  • FB: Cameron Shits In Primark
  • RH: Cherie Shits In Purse
  • FB: Cock Slip Impregnates Panda
  • FB: Catholic Schools Invented Paedophilia
  • AP: Cameron's Sushi Included Polonium
  • HD: Cameron Slips In Polls
  • AP: Cameron Slump In Polls
  • MW: Conservatives Slip In Polls

Green indicates unbroadcast suggestions released on the first Too Hot For TV DVD.

Between The Lines

Hugh Dennis tells us what David Beckham (Frankie Boyle) is really saying to LA Galaxy fans.

• FB: I'm glad to have this oppurtunity to let you know what I'm thinking

• HD: (stares blankly)
• FB: It's great to have left Real Madrid
• HD: I hate Poland
• FB: I've bought a house in LA, right by the big HOLLYWOOD sign
• HD: I'd love to know what it says
• FB: Brooklyn has settled in well at an American school
• HD: He shot someone
• FB: My wife knows how much I love her
• HD: I sent her a text by mistake
• FB: I was suprised to learn that I was wanted by Scientology
• HD: I didn't know they had a team
• FB: Tom Cruise's wife Katie is always advising us to buy more staff
• HD: She keeps sending me notes saying "Get help"

Spin The News Bottle

Identity Theft	Terror Threat	Drugs	Celebrity
Mark Watson	Jo Caulfield	Andy Parsons	Frankie Boyle

If This Is the Answer, What Is the Question?

Sport

• Answer: 250,000
• Question: How many Beckham replica shirts are LA Galaxy already claiming to have sold?

• JC: The amount of Iceland dinners the robbers took from Kerry Katona's house
• AP: What world ranking is the British tennis number 5?
• FB: How many calories in a Scottish salad?
• MW: What position did I finish in the 1987 Henleaze School sports day obstacle race, because I got stuck in the sack, but it didn't traumatize me at all, I don't even care now
• AP: If you phone up British Telecom what position in the queue are you likely to be?
• FB: What percentage of people failed O level maths?

Too Hot For TV answers:

• FB: How many volts does it take to give Stephen Hawking an erection?
• MW: How much of a dickhead is Victoria Beckham out of ten?
• FB: Of all the fan mail she receives everyday, how many letters does the actress Kirsten Dunst simply put into a file marked "Sexually Menacing"?
• RH: How much does Bill Gates earn whilst defacating?
• FB: How many people starred in the Chinese version of "The Magnificent Seven"?
• FB: The invention of an invisibility cloak would lead to what rise in annual sex offences?

Scenes We'd Like To See

Topics

• The worst thing to hear over a tannoy system.
• Unlikely lines from the final Harry Potter book.

External links

• Series 5, Episode 2 at TV.com
• Series 5, Episode 2 at the British Comedy Guide
• Series 5, Episode 2 at the Internet Movie Database